Why Is My Child Struggling in School? How to Request a School Evaluation for Special Education Services
- Kathy Cousineau
- Mar 11
- 10 min read
Updated: Mar 23
If you’re reading this late at night, worried about your child, you’re not alone.
Many parents end up here after another difficult evening of homework.
Maybe it looked something like this:
Your child sits at the kitchen table, staring at a reading passage. You gently say, “Let’s just try the first sentence.”
They sound out a few words… then suddenly the tears come.
“I hate reading.”
“I’m just bad at school.”
“I can’t do this.”
You try to reassure them, but inside, your heart sinks a little 💔.
Because moments like this often lead parents to start asking difficult questions, you might be wondering:
Why is homework such a struggle for my child?
Why does my child hate reading?
Why is school becoming so frustrating for them?
A child may struggle in school when learning becomes more difficult due to learning differences, attention challenges, or missing skills.
As schoolwork becomes harder, some children feel overwhelmed—especially when they are trying but not succeeding.
You might notice:
Frustration during homework
Avoiding schoolwork
Negative feelings about school
These behaviors are often signs that your child may need more support.
When these struggles continue over time, many parents begin to wonder if there may be an underlying reason behind what they’re seeing.
Does My Child Have a Learning Disability?
One of the most common questions parents ask at this point is whether their child may have a learning disability.
Quick answer: A learning disability is a difference in how a child’s brain processes information. It can affect reading, writing, math, or memory.
When struggles continue over time or show up across different subjects, many parents begin to wonder if there’s a pattern to what they’re seeing.
At this point, it can be helpful to step back and get a clearer picture of your child’s learning, what’s going well, and what feels difficult.
If you’re not sure what you’re seeing or how it all fits together, the Understanding
YOUR Child’s Learning Challenges Quiz can help you look at different areas of learning and identify patterns that may be worth exploring further.
An evaluation for special education can then help determine if your child has a disability and what support may help them succeed.
Before jumping to conclusions, though, it helps to understand what these challenges can actually look like in everyday learning.
What Are the Signs of a Learning Disability in Children?
Quick answer: Signs include trouble reading, writing, or math, difficulty following directions, and frustration with schoolwork.
Children learn at different rates, but persistent struggles may signal something deeper.
Parents often notice patterns like:
📚 Reading struggles
difficulty sounding out words
slow or choppy reading
avoiding reading
✏️ Writing difficulties
messy handwriting
trouble expressing ideas on paper
spelling struggles
➕ Math challenges
difficulty remembering math facts
trouble solving word problems
🧠 Memory or attention struggles
forgetting instructions
difficulty following multi-step directions
😟 Emotional signs
anxiety about school
frustration with homework
saying “I hate school!”
If several of these challenges appear consistently, it may be time to explore a school evaluation for learning disabilities.
While occasional struggles are part of learning, consistent patterns like these are often what signal it may be time to take a closer look.
So how do you know when these challenges are something to keep an eye on, and when it’s time to take action?
When Should I Worry About My Child
Struggling in School?
Quick answer: Parents should be concerned if struggles happen often, schoolwork causes stress, or progress slows down.
Look for patterns like:
Daily homework battles
Ongoing frustration or tears during schoolwork
Lack of progress, even with extra practice
Avoiding reading, writing, or school tasks
Homework taking much longer than expected
Difficulty remembering or following directions
Saying things like “I hate school” or “I can’t do this.”
When these patterns persist, your child may need additional support.
Sometimes, these patterns are connected to specific learning challenges. For example, you might notice signs that point to reading difficulties like dyslexia, writing challenges such as dysgraphia, or math-related struggles like dyscalculia.
Other times, the difficulty may be related to things like attention, auditory processing skills, executive functioning, working memory, or even school-related anxiety—all of which can affect how a child learns and completes schoolwork.
If you’re trying to make sense of what you’re seeing, it can help to learn more about these different learning challenges and how they show up in real life. Understanding these patterns can give you more clarity about what your child may be experiencing. At My Happy Teacher, we’ve written parent-friendly blog posts about each of these learning challenges to help families better understand what their child may be experiencing.
As you begin to connect these patterns, many parents find that the next step is learning how to request a school evaluation to better understand their child’s needs.
If you’re considering that step, it helps to first understand what a school evaluation actually involves.
What Is a School Evaluation and Do I Need One?
Quick answer: A school evaluation helps determine how your child learns and whether they need special education services.
This special education evaluation looks at several areas to understand how your child learns, including:
Academic skills (reading, writing, and math)
Thinking and memory skills
Attention and focus
Speech and language skills
Social and emotional development
Executive functioning (planning, organizing, and completing tasks)
This process helps identify both strengths and areas where support may be needed.
For many parents, this is the first real step toward understanding why their child is struggling.
Once you decide to move forward, the next question becomes: what do you actually need to do to get the process started?
How Does the School Evaluation Process Work?
Quick answer: To request a school evaluation, send a written request to your child’s school describing your concerns and asking for testing.
If you’re wondering how to request a school evaluation, follow these steps:
Step 1: Notice patterns
Pay attention to what you’re seeing over time.
This might include:
Struggles with reading, writing, or math
Frustration during homework
Avoiding schoolwork
Difficulty following directions
Write down specific examples. This helps you clearly explain your concerns.
Step 2: Gather evidence
Collect anything that shows how your child is doing in school, such as:
Report cards
Work samples
Teacher feedback
Your notes about homework or behavior
This gives the school a better picture of your child’s learning needs.
Step 3: Submit a written request
Send a short letter or email to your child’s school sharing your concerns. You can include a few examples of what you’ve been noticing and ask the school to evaluate your child to better understand their learning needs and whether they may need extra support.
👉 This step officially starts the evaluation process.
Step 4: Ask for Copies of Your Child's Evaluation Results
Be sure to request copies of your child’s evaluation results so you can review them at your own pace, better understand the findings, and prepare questions before the Team meeting.
Step 5: Prepare for the Team Meeting
After testing is completed, the school schedules a Team meeting.
During this meeting, the Team reviews:
📄 evaluation results
📄 eligibility for services
📄 possible supports
While there may be many school staff at the meeting, remember that parents are essential members of the Team. Your perspective matters, so feel confident asking questions and sharing what you know about your child.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed or unsure how to get started—or not quite sure how to put your concerns into words—you’re not alone.
Once you’ve taken these steps, it can also help to understand what’s happening behind the scenes on the school’s end.
What Happens During a School Evaluation?
Quick answer: After you submit a request, the school takes several steps to review your concerns, complete testing, and determine whether your child qualifies for support.
While the steps above focus on what you do as a parent, here’s what typically happens on the school’s side:
The school reviews your request and may ask for additional information
You provide consent for evaluation before testing begins
School specialists assess your child’s learning, behavior, and development
The Team meets to review results and determine eligibility
Schools follow guidelines from the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA) to ensure the evaluation is thorough and fair.
After the evaluation, the Team uses the results to decide whether your child qualifies for special education services and what support may be recommended.
From there, the next step is understanding how eligibility is actually determined.
How Does a Child Qualify for Special Education Services?
Quick answer: A child qualifies for special education if the evaluation shows they have a disability and need support to succeed.
When schools talk about “support,” they mean the help and changes put in place to make learning easier and more effective for your child.
This can include things like:
Extra help with reading, writing, or math
Small group or one-on-one instruction
Extra time on assignments or tests
Help staying organized or focused
Changes to how work is taught or completed
Support from specialists, such as reading teachers or speech therapists
The goal of this support is to help your child learn in a way that works best for them, so school feels less frustrating and more successful.
To determine if a student qualifies for special education services, the Team will:
Review results
Determine eligibility
Decide if support is needed
If your child is eligible, they may receive an IEP (Individualized Education Program), which is a plan that outlines the support, services, and goals designed to help your child succeed in school..
But what if your child doesn’t qualify? That’s a common concern for many parents.
What If My Child Is Not Eligible for Special Education Services?
Quick answer: If your child is not eligible, the school may still provide support in general education.
If the evaluation shows your child does not qualify for special education services, it does not mean your child won’t get help.
During the meeting, the Team may still suggest ways to support your child in the general classroom, either through a 504 or a general education accommodation plan. This can include:
Extra help from the teacher
Small group instruction
Classroom accommodations (like extra time or reduced workload)
Strategies to support focus, organization, or learning
You can also ask questions and share what you’re seeing at home. Your input still matters, even if your child is not found eligible.
In some cases, parents choose to:
Ask for additional support from the school
Monitor progress over time
Or explore outside support if needed
Even if your child is not eligible right now, you can request another evaluation in the future if concerns continue.
This raises an important question about timing: when are you allowed to request a school evaluation?
Can I Request a School Evaluation at Any Time?
Quick answer: A child can be evaluated at any school age if there are concerns about learning or development.
Parents have the right to request a school evaluation at any time if they believe their child may have a learning disability or may need special education services.
However, in many schools, you may hear terms like “wait and see” or be told your child should go through MTSS (Multi-Tiered System of Supports) first.
MTSS is a system where the school provides different levels of support in general education before moving to a formal evaluation. While this support can be helpful, it does not take away your right to request an evaluation.
If you are concerned, you can still:
Ask the school to evaluate your child
Submit a written request for a school evaluation
Begin the evaluation process
Once you request an evaluation in writing, the school must respond and explain the next steps.
If your child continues to struggle, it’s okay to trust your instincts and move forward with an evaluation rather than waiting.
With all of this in mind, here’s a simple way to think about what to do next when your child is struggling in school.
Bottom Line: What Should I Do If My Child Is Struggling in School?
If your child is struggling in school, the most important thing you can do is pay attention to what you’re seeing and take it one step at a time.
Start here:
Notice patterns in your child’s learning and behavior
Ask questions and talk with your child’s teacher
Request a school evaluation if concerns continue
Follow the evaluation process to better understand your child’s needs
You don’t have to figure everything out all at once. Taking the first step—whether that’s noticing patterns or asking questions—can start to bring clarity.
Over time, these steps can help you understand how your child learns and what kind of support may help them feel more confident and successful at school.
Frequently Asked Questions
Can I request a school evaluation at any time?
Yes. Parents can request a school evaluation at any time if they have concerns about their child’s learning or development. You do not have to wait for the school to suggest it.
Do I have to wait for MTSS or “wait and see”?
No. While schools may suggest supports like MTSS first, you still have the right to request an evaluation at any time. A written request starts the evaluation process.
Is a school evaluation free?
In public schools, a school evaluation is free. It is part of the school’s responsibility to identify and support students who may need special education services.
How do I request a school evaluation?
You can request a school evaluation by sending a written request to your child’s school explaining your concerns and asking for testing.
How long does a school evaluation take?
Timelines vary by state, but once you give permission, schools usually have a set number of days to complete the evaluation and review the results with you.
What happens after I request an evaluation?
The school will review your request, ask for your permission, and begin testing. After testing, you will meet with the Team to go over the results and next steps.
What if my child is not eligible?
If your child is not eligible for special education, the school may still offer support in the general classroom, such as extra help or accommodations.
What should I do if I’m not sure where to start?If you’re unsure how to request an evaluation or what to do next, you’re not alone—this process can feel overwhelming at first.
To help you take the next step with confidence, the Roadmap to an Initial Evaluation is a step-by-step guide designed to walk you through the process.
It covers:
✔ organizing concerns
✔ gathering evidence
✔ writing the request letter
✔ understanding results
✔ preparing for the Team meeting
Having step-by-step guidance, like the Roadmap to an Initial Evaluation, can help you move forward with more clarity and confidence.
The Roadmap walks parents through:
✔ organizing concerns about your child’s learning
✔ gathering evidence of struggles
✔ writing the evaluation request letter
✔ understanding testing results
✔ preparing for the Team meeting
If you are feeling overwhelmed and unsure about next steps, remember...
You Don’t Have to Navigate This Alone 💜
A parent once told me,
"I just knew something wasn’t right, but I didn’t know what to do next."
If your child is struggling in school, trust your instincts. Parents are often the first to notice when something isn’t quite right with their child’s learning.
Understanding your child’s learning profile can change everything. It helps you identify the supports, strategies, and tools that will help them thrive.
If you would like step-by-step guidance through this journey, you can explore the Roadmap to an Initial Evaluation, which helps parents navigate every stage of requesting and understanding the school evaluation process, right through how to prepare for a Team meeting.
Because every child deserves the opportunity to succeed, and every parent deserves the tools to help them get there. 💜
💜 Still Want to Talk Things Through?💜
Sometimes it helps to talk with someone who understands learning challenges and the school evaluation process. We can talk through what you’re noticing, answer questions, and help you think about next steps.
If that would be helpful, schedule a time to talk below. 💜
